PSIII 19 Holding The Lightning

19 – Holding The Lightning

19/1 – The Fear Of Power

It's a fact that just about every possible human relationship problem and nine out of ten behaviour problems revolves around a perceived lack of power.

A really and truly powerful person has simply no need for aggression, domination, exterminating a whole race of people they perceive as threats, throwing their weight around or any of the nasty and highly morally reprehensible behaviours so wrongly connected with the concepts of power - when all of these are simply an admission that whoever is perpetrating said acts is feeling basically powerless, and afraid, and has to resort to such tactics in order to bolster their failing self esteem.

We've already noted that this internal realm we've created might be for some people the first contact with having any, never mind such absolute power - and what they experience is not that absolute power corrupts absolutely, but that in fact it makes the holder of this truly absolute power stop and realise that there's nothing to be afraid of anymore, that they are totally safe, totally supported, totally abundant and totally free - because the kind of power that lies within the sanctuary is way above and beyond that what any kind of dictator, serial killer or emperor could ever even begin to imagine or manifest in reality.

If in this environment they then still want to go ahead and rape, burn, pillage and enslave, the amusing side effect will be probably nothing more and nothing less than that they will end up with an outbreak of psychosomatic diseases and horrible nightmares! What a perfect system to learn the lessons of power - and all in the safety of one's own body, mind and soul.

I’m aware of the fact that it is unpopular to talk about the “dark sides of human nature” in the field of personal development where all strive to just look on the bright side at all times, but nonetheless, I think it’s important to acknowledge the realities of our situations, our thoughts and our emotions.

Here is a “lesson in power” as expressed by one man who allowed himself to let go and play out his darkest fantasies in Sanctuary.

“The three women are absolutely helpless before me.

“I want to explode them where they stand, I want to rip them to shreds with a profound longing and the only reason I’m not doing it is because it would be too quick, would be unsatisfactory, would not and could not ever fill my desire to have them be in such pain, suffer so totally that their suffering would somehow heal me, somehow fill my hunger and sate it or even begin to alleviate it.

“And the truth is as I have always known that all the screaming they could do, and not just these here in front of me but all the ones they stood for, worlds upon worlds of these, screaming for all eternities would not begin to fill me, could never even begin to satisfy me.”

You, dear reader, might be appalled by this but what this statements represents in truth is an understanding that totally changed this man. His repressed desires to “explode the women” were never an end in themselves but only a result of something else, a terrible need and hunger that he understood at that moment, could never be filled in that way. It opened up the understanding that he needed to find something else in order to fill this hunger. When he did find out what it was, you could say that the very instant it happened he ceased to be a ticking time bomb or a latent threat to the women in society; and that is quite aside from the changes to him and his own life and relationships.

The facts of power are simply that once you have it, you can do with it what you like – there is no inherent link between goodness and the amount of power you are given and indeed, in that sense power is exactly like a knife. There is a hand and this hand belongs always to a single individual who makes the decisions to use the knife to peel an apple or stab someone in the throat.

It is certainly one of the scariest of moments when one realises that one holds such power, and then it gets even scarier as an individual is confronted with their choices in this circumstance and the illusions of “being a nice person, really ...” begins to crumble under the onslaught of reality.

In order to avoid this from ever happening, people gladly disempower themselves in any way they can, using others to carry their powers for them, abdicate from them, pretend they don’t and never did have them and a host of other games designed to defuse themselves.

A very good friend of mine once remarked that: “Power is only dangerous in the hands of an angry man.” I am sure he used the term “man” as in hu’man’, to be sure.

Learning about your anger in sanctuary, as the gentleman who wanted to “explode women” did so profoundly that day is a good place to be learning about it and long before it has reached explosion point and you find yourself with a shotgun on the roof of your local McDonald’s.

At the root of most anger if not all lie injuries that need to be found and healed from the ground up; and it is my contention that people who are balanced and no longer in an agony of needs, hungers, wants and in constant pain from the injuries that others inflicted upon them are safe to hold the lightning of personal power at last.

19/2 – As I Will ...

In English, the word “will” is most generally used in the context of a future possibility: “I will do this tomorrow”, for example.

It also occurs as a verb but is used very rarely that way in ordinary conversation. To will something is the act of making something happen using your will or intention, as in: “He willed the traffic lights to change.”

In witchcraft there exists the statement, “As I will, so mote it be.” meaning that, “My will will be done.” That is a very powerful statement of intention and of power which once again, is surprisingly rare in every day life here in the Hard.

I have observed a good many people “trying” to make that statement of, “As I will, so mote it be.” but failing entirely to make it ring true, have it be what it is supposed to be, namely an unwavering statement of truth that cannot do any other but unfold exactly as the will of the individual decided that it should.

In order to make this statement, conflicts of personal power and should or should nots, can or cannots, am allowed or not allowed and so forth will have to have been completely resolved before the statement is made; in the Hard this is not an easy thing to do and the feedback and situations are difficult. In the Sanctuary realms, however, you can learn to do this in perfect safety and with instant feedback on your endeavours.

I have created the following progression to make it easier to attain the “I WILL this to happen NOW.” expression which arises naturally from a state of deep conviction and inner alignment and cannot work in any other way.

I highly recommend you practise this progression on a number of different aspects and desires in Sanctuary; it will make manifesting in the Hard much, much easier for you.

a) The Seed

In order to do something or have something happen, we firstly have to have an idea as the seed to start the process of. For our purposes here, it might be a fairly nebulous idea of a special object you require, a special guide or person, a house or a landscape that would bring you something you really need to be all you were always supposed to be.

b) I Wish

The next step is to “wish” you had this object, item, energy, whatever. This is not an offhanded thing but a magical state and a very specific request to the all-there-is, and which in Sanctuary is mostly yourself and all your resources, including your Higher Self and all your guides and helpers.

To help you with the “wishing state”, it is very useful to do this in the right place and time. You could, for example, have a wishing well in your Sanctuary, or a special building, a temple or suchlike, where you would step up and make your request, very seriously and very specifically.

You might have heard stories where wishes came true in a very unfortunate way, such as the Monkey’s Paw story and the many tales of genies who fulfil wishes in an evil way that ends up hurting the wisher. Now many have taken this to mean that the supernatural forces who grant such wishes are evil bastards who are out to get us and punish us for the act of wishing, but that is not so. What these stories are trying to do is to explain that one should be careful what one wishes for, and to take great care in formulating these statements and request. In order to be able to do this, it’s important to think about what it is that you want for a time, and be sure you are wanting this for the right reasons and from the right states of mind.

At the wishing state, a lot of objections become apparent – “Is this really what I want? What would happen if I got that? Would it be good for me?” and so on and so forth, and I’m sure you can see now why it is so important to consider these things and resolve them before we say, “As I will, so mote it be.” and become your own evil genie who sets in motion a chain of events that leads to nothing beneficial at all.

When these objections or conflicts have been successfully resolved and all feels good and right in all ways, then we step up and officially make the wish.

Now please understand that this is not done in this progression to have the wish be granted magically from within or without, although this might happen sometimes and make the rest of this exercise immaterial; what you might find in Sanctuary is that the result may or may not materialise right away, and it may materialise in such a way that it isn’t entirely formed as yet.

We need another stage to bring the magic closer to ourselves and away from genies, angelic interventions and the like, and this stage is to say, ...

c) I Want

There is a big difference to say, “I wish this will happen.” and to say, “I WANT this to happen.” To want something is an application and statement of will of an individual; there is a different energy flow, from towards you from the outside, to from you outward into the universe.

“Wanting” something is also very interestingly very different from “needing” something – wanting is something you do when your needs are already fulfilled. This is one of the most annoying problems beginner magicians find themselves faced with and the one which, if it hasn’t been clearly understood, causes people to throw the whole magical reality creation away in a huff, namely that when you try to do magic from a place of neediness, absolutely nothing happens at all, no matter how desperately you try.

It seems such a paradox – when you have all the money you need already, then it’s so easy to make some more. The same with love, recognition and everything else the universe has to offer to a human being. When you don’t have it and you’re totally desperate, it really is like as though the entire universe deliberately turns its back on you for all your pleading, begging and spell casting.

Yet it is actually not a paradox at all but a simple lesson in how things work. Magic is for people who are stable, balanced, healed and therefore able to handle the energies evoked and involved. You can only get to do it when you are ready to do it, and this means of course having handled the basics of survival on all levels successfully.

The “I want” stage therefore is that declaration of having done the pre-requisite work to fulfil the needs and now being ready for more and what lies beyond these basic survival needs.

Before you step up to your place of declaring what it is that you want therefore, be sure to have worked out that you are NOT doing this from a place of need for simply, that’s the wrong place altogether and nothing beneficial for anyone concerned can come of it.

It is very possible that at this stage, you might have to take a real break and go back to sort out your unfulfilled needs on every level before you get to step up and declare, “I want.” in the sacred realms of Sanctuary.

d) I Will

Now, to stand somewhere and from a place of freedom from need declare clearly that you “want” something to happen, or change, or manifest is a very powerful thing already. It includes a great many things without which this can’t be done at all, and for one it states that you have a right to want this thing. It also includes that you are ready and willing to receive it, and to accept all the consequences this entails.

This is an absolute pre-requisite to stepping up and now, clearly and without reservations, absolutely aligned and absolutely without fear, hindrance or any conflict at all, bring this desire into being by saying, “As I will, so mote it be.”

This is the state of magic and it is perhaps the most powerful state of being for a human to experience whilst we are who we are and where we are.

By all means, take your time before you step up to make your will manifest. Take your time to explore the repercussions and be sure that you are ready to handle what you are calling into being, because make no mistake, when you are making your will thus manifest in the fabric of time and space, it will come into being.

A special ritual place and time help give you a sensation of the sheer grandeur of this undertaking and of its importance. You may like to create a surrounding ritual for yourself before you do this extraordinary thing, a truly human thing which so many have attempted over the millennia, and so few have ever achieved.