Anger Management, EFT, Meridians and The Apex Effect
by
Silvia Hartmann
I had a very strange experience this morning.
I was just chatting to a friend, when she started to say something. I could hear
her talking but I didn't know at all what she was talking about, it made no
sense and I felt strange, displaced and a little uncomfortable.
I thought, well, I'll just wait until the end of her explanation, I'm sure I can
pick up something there to know what she is saying but just then, she did
conclude whatever it was and asked, "Do you know what I mean?"
There was no point in pretending, so very honestly, I said, "I have no idea. Not
a clue. I didn't understand any of that at all. I'm completely lost. What ARE
you on about?"
We both laughed then because I don't think in 6 years of daily conversations
that had EVER happened before, not as far as I remember, anyway!
So we started again. She asked some questions and slowly, it was as though some
thing came back, first quite nebulously and then more strongly, it became
apparent that she was referring to a sequence of very important events which had
happened the day before, but I had completely forgotten about.
Well, let us be a little more precise. I hadn't just forgotten them, I had
completely APEXED these events, and that seems to be a very different matter
altogether.
I must confess to being a little shocked and then I got paranoid. The events she
had been referring to were so totally gone from my conscious memory, it was
highly unusual to say the least. It really was for that time up until she
mentioned it as though they had never taken place at all, they were simply not
there at all. There seemed to be no connection to anything else, as though all
of that had been taken out of my hard drive altogether and stored somewhere
else.
The only reason Nicola referred to it was because I had considered what had
happened as so important, I called her the night before and told her all about
it.
As far as I know, and that is the paranoia part, this is the first time I've
actually after all these years of EFT have really experienced full on and
personally the power of the apex effect.
When I used to do EFT regularly with clients, it happened sometimes, very
rarely, but the three occasions where it really did happen and I found out about
it where literally spooky. I really did not quite credit or understand just how
the apex affect actually feels, what that really is and how unusual a form of
memory re-storage to some very far away place it represents.
Still now, when I think of the events Nicola had been referring to, they seem a
million miles away, as though that was something that happened years and years
ago, or in a past life. So I thought, I'll write an article about the whole
thing, see if that will help me remember the details of what happened ONLY
YESTERDAY EVENING, less than 24 hours ago.
Anger Management & Meridian Treatments
As far as I remember, I've always had what would be described as a pretty
violent temper.
I was given to major tantrums as a child and even as an adult, could really
"lose it" completely over the smallest thing, and to a frightening extent.
To be fair, I've lived my life being terrified of my own temper and any
circumstances that could cause me to "let rip", and all those who in spite of
that chose to hang around with me, or were condemned to it by being my children,
were also mostly on tenterhooks.
If I could feel something coming on, my response would be to immediately remove
myself from the situation. People who did not know me took that as a sign that I
"would avoid conflict" and that's exactly right, only not for the reasons they
might have suspected. I avoided conflict because if pushed into a corner,
physically or metaphorically, I would become extremely dangerous because I would
lose conscious control over my actions and simply go in for the kill.
To wake up from one of those attacks and to see what one did during them, then
to have to face the aftermath of one's "societally unacceptable behaviour" is
extremely disturbing, extremely frightening indeed, so yeah. Avoidance was the
only way to deal with it.
As any mention of my anger explosions and/or the ever present simmering
possibility of that made me even more angry, of course anger management wasn't
an option because talking to me about my anger made me angry and set that thing
in motion that I needed to avoid at all costs.
But last night, I had an occurrence whereby it happened surprisingly, and
unpredictably the events programme became triggered. I really freaked out and
lost it again, over a seemingly tiny thing, namely opening a long awaited mail
order parcel and finding that the order inside it was totally wrong in every
way.
I actually don't remember any details of that but I have a flash of being in the
car with my son as we were going to dinner at a restaurant and thinking that I
didn't want the experience to be spoiled by my "mood" and also, being quite
afraid of what might happen if the waitor was to keep us waiting, or there was
something wrong with the meal.
I struggled to try and regain some form of balance in the car but it was just
hopeless, I was too close to that place now, and it did occur to me that
something had flipped, something had blown, I had really blown a fuse somewhere.
Luckily for all concerned, the waitor was friendly and a good table was to be
had. We sat down, ordered drinks. I was still internally battling with myself,
but vibrating way too fast, thoughts unclear and very unstable, when through all
of that I remembered something that Ananga Sivyer, meridian specialist, had said
about main body meridians being blown out.
That gave me a line to some form of cohesion and I remembered EFT then, which
had not been in that strange world at all before, and in the restaurant, with
apologies to my son, I started to tap.
I started under the right eye, and that felt as badly bruised as though I really
did have an old, black eye there, and the thought occurred to me that I did feel
all over as though I'd just been in a punch up, gone ten rounds of boxing with
someone and was basically just waiting for the bell to ring again to make me
jump off the stool and back into the ring, find the opponent, and punch their
lights out before they get to do the same to me.
I don't remember anything else after that, until I hit the middle finger point
at some time later and that's when it switched.
It was as though I was waking up from a weird nightmare, came instantly awake in
that restaurant and wondered how I got to be there.
I could breathe again and felt fine, like normal, perhaps better than normal,
clear and bright and very, very relaxed.
The middle finger point is the governor. When that goes, how is one to govern
oneself?
If my experiences are anything to go by, it is impossible.
The tapping really did the trick. We had a fine time in the restaurant, and when
my meal came with chips rather than the potatoes I'd ordered, I just laughed and
ate them.
Later on, I got the wrong dessert as well and me and my son just laughed
helplessly at the madness of getting **THREE** separate orders wrong in less
than two hours, with 3 different lots of people involved, and mused at the ways
of magic.
I didn't feel that I had to complain, there wasn't a trace of anger and instead,
I was wondering how I do that, how I disturb the fields of people so badly that
they can't help but get my orders madly wrong, no matter how far away they are,
as was the case with the mail order company, or how experienced they are as
waiters.
A Lifetime Of Misery ...
When I got home, I phoned Nicola to tell her about it.
She was shocked, for like all people, "we don't talk about Silvia's anger
issues", right?
Dearie me ...
One of the things I noted was that there must be so many people, who, like
myself, think that they have a bad temper, or no will power, or no self control,
or they're just badasses and evil, or whatever one tries to make of these "power
loss events" when something just gives and then you become some kind of
terminator.
It is incredibly frightening, incredibly worrying and it is not until AFTER that
EFT treatment in the restaurant did it come to my conscious attention at all
just how much I have suffered from this for all these years.
I can't begin to count the cost to myself and others in lost opportunities,
problems with relationships, endless stress and paranoia and most of all, self
esteem.
Going around and KNOWING that just any odd thing could happen at any time, and
you could end up killing your own nearest and dearest is a NIGHTMARE.
And you can't get to it, you can't even admit you have a problem with it,
because those very ideas and thoughts will TRIGGER THE THING YOU ARE TRYING TO
AVOID.
All those poor people who are in jail because of this.
All those poor people whose relationships fall apart because of this.
This, what could well be nothing more than a blown out main body meridian and
its requisite circuits, and something that could well be TOTALLY TREATABLE, and
easily so, if we only knew that it was.
How incredibly difficult it is to even broach that subject with someone who has
spent a lifetime with it and built every barrier, boundary, defense a human
being can build against having it happen is testified to by the fact that I've
been doing personal development for over 20 years now and not ONCE in all that
time have sought to approach the "anger management problems".
In hindsight, and out of the vicious circle now, I can see why and have every
understanding for it. I don't feel guilty about this because I completely
understand now that it is like a sickness, or having broken your leg, or, as I
suspect strongly, having had your legs broken in the past by someone else.
There is no shame in having a blown out, unstable major body meridian as a
result of accident or incident.
I didn't do this to myself, and I wasn't "born bad".
I didn't want to be this uncontrolled. I fought my entire life with bloody
determination to protect my environment from myself best I could, and there is
no-one who could have passed harder and more brutal judgements AND punishments
upon myself than I did.
I suspect that I am not the only one with this problem.
I'm going to seek some further help to repair especially that system so that it
remains stable and doesn't fall apart on me when things go wrong in the
environment.
And if I could talk to "wife beaters", "bad asses" and at least 30% of all those
who sit in jail because they lost it and stabbed or beaten the shit out of
someone, and tell them that there is a very good chance that they are not
irreparably insane, not ridden by the devil himself but probably just sustained
major damage in their energy systems when they were young, AND that this is
repairable, I certainly would.
I would also highly recommend that especially kinesiologist might consider
offering "Anger Management" treatments with EFT as the selp helf treatment
device for use at home.
This is a very serious problem in people that can cause so much harm, and it
seems that there is a good chance that it can be alliviated. I don't know if it
will work for everyone but I would highly, highly urge anyone who has this
problem, or knows someone who does, to recommend at least trying a treatment.
They might, as I did yesterday, wake up and find the world to be a totally
place.
So different, in fact, that they might forget all about it after they went to
sleep that night.
Silvia Hartmann, 21. 5. 2004
https://starfields.org
Silvia Hartmann: I was so fascinated by my responses to the changes
in my energy system that I asked Ananga Sivyer, Friend, Meridian specialist and
Ayurvedic Psychology Researcher, to add comments about Anger Management and the
Meridian System.
She kindly responded with the following fascinating insights:
Anger Management & The Meridian System
by
Ananga Sivyer
The Meridian system as I understand it, operates as an interface between the
physical and more subtle energy channels of the body. It operates very much like
an electrical circuitry, and it can be "blown" as can a fuse. As with fuses,
this is a protection device and, again as with fuses, if not repaired, areas of
that circuitry governed by that particular fuse will remain "offline".
Let's clarify that a bit further so that we can be fully aware of the
significance and ramifications of this for us, as human beings. I have a toaster
in my kitchen that is a little sensitive, and every so often it lets out a spark
and trips the fuse in our fuse box. When that happens there is no toast in our
house, there are no lights in half the kitchen either, until somebody goes to
the cupboard and flips the switch back.
So the toaster is on a circuit that also affects the kitchen lights; two basic
resources on that circuit. But wait that means the socket that the toaster is
plugged into is affected too so no using the blender either then, or the
microwave.
Now, if we generalise that basic understanding over to the meridian system we
can quickly understand that if a particular 'circuit' blows due to shock,
trauma, or overload then the resources of that circuit are also affected. This
happens to varying degrees, as the meridian system is more subtle and complex
than the wiring in our homes, but nonetheless the principle remains the same; we
have energy circuits, those circuits facilitate certain experiences and nurture
specific resources and if they are disrupted then those resources will be
directly affected.
The meridians serve as regulators, protectors and facilitators, one of them is
even referred to as 'the heart protector', and its main purpose is just that
to protect the heart. As the heart is the King of the Energy Court it must be
protected at all costs. The heart is the master fuse and if that blows,
logically enough, the whole system goes offline.
But back to anger, the twelve main meridians are each teamed with a physical
organ in the body and that organ is responsible for a key set of emotions and
experiences. Here balance is the key, and EFT is certainly an incredibly easy
and effective tool to apply in this regard.
According to the Traditional Chinese model of health, anger has its place, even
rage, but these emotions are considered to have a time and place in which they
are useful and appropriate and, after their purpose has been achieved, they
should fade and take their place in waiting until called again, if genuinely
required.
When a fuse blows in the circuits that generate the experience of anger, a
strange loop can develop whereby that anger is re-generated repeatedly, and for
matters of trivial concern. It can become a self-perpetuating cycle and, unless
it is interrupted and restored, it will soon begin to burn out other areas of
the circuitry.
If, in a system that is operating under extreme pressure, anger gets the job
done, or more significantly, feeds back to us a sense that it protects us from
certain unwanted situations or experiences, it can become an overused and
dominant emotion, and when that happens the scales of balance are tipped and the
resources at the other end of that scale go offline.
Meridians Most Relevant To Anger
Let's look at the organ meridian channels that are relevant to anger:
There are two, and they work as a team the liver and the gallbladder
?The liver is responsible for an assortment of emotional expressions with anger
being the most prominent. The governing of patience comes under the control of
the liver and its partner the gall bladder - impatience is regarded as a sign of
imbalance within this team.
When disturbed the liver energy reacts with aggression and shouting or with
depression and also with crying of a particular type - this crying is the kind
born of sheer frustration and is likened to a safety valve. (excerpt from The
Art & Science of Emotional Freedom)
When the liver energy is disturbed we shout and when we shout, we disturb the
liver energy. Frustration disturbs the liver energy, and frustration is a
manifestation of disturbed liver energy. Here we have the loop effect the
self-perpetuating cycle. And this is an area that I consider to be of key
importance to any of us interested in how we operate, and how we might operate
more smoothly.
There is an exercise in the systems of Chinese Energy medicine called ?smiling
at your inner organs?; we tend, in the west, to view such things as cultural
quaintness. The Chinese smile at their inner organs, how nice, what an
interesting custom. But there is practical purpose here, very simple and very
effective. It is a practical exercise in personal care and kindness. When I was
a child I would have given anything, truly anything, to receive a smile from my
father instead of a shout. A warm, genuine, smile is a thing that is greatly
soothing to the spirit. So there is a purpose here - paying (and in using that
word I mean really paying as in actively investing) attention to our internal
organs and energy systems with a few moments gentleness, kindness and soft
appreciation, actually does go a long way to keeping our circuitry free from
blow out.
OK, so that's nice to know, a preventative measure and something to try in the
milder cases of irritation; but when you?re really mad, will it work? Sadly,
probably not. There I times when you could tell me to smile at my liver and I
will do so gladly and laugh too; but there are other times when you would really
wish you hadn't said that!
It's all a question of time place and circumstance. Remedies that fit the
occasion; we don't stick plasters on gaping wounds, and we won't benefit for a
spell of inner smiling when there's a blown circuit.
But we can tap, someway, somehow, if we can train ourselves to use EFT at such
times even if it is as simple as making a habit of raising a hand and tapping
the side of our eye when we feel that rage bubbling to the surface, we are in
with a very good a chance at developing some excellent anger management skills.
And not just that, but resource reclamation too; I mentioned balance, with the
meridian system, this means a point of stillness between two ends of a possible
range of experiences; a place where we have all the emotions, responses and
actions available to us along that scale.
A balanced liver will show itself in impetus and forward momentum, which
includes aspirations and higher ideals and it facilitates achievement without
aggression. It has the energy of spring time and is a generator of new growth
and beginnings. It is creative, nourishing and forward moving.
What the liver really dislikes is frustration, those times when you feel you are
really trying and getting nowhere. And if you get a few of those in a run, or
over a period of time, the liver gets very irritable.
Here?s an overview of some of the resources available to us when the liver
energy is balanced: drive, planning, impetus to start projects, endurance, good
reflexes, perseverance, quick and clear intellect, an agreeable disposition,
ambition, patience and a sense of general well being.
And that can facilitate anger too, in an appropriate expression accompanied by
clear thinking and a genuine desire for a beneficial outcome; controlled, useful
anger is available when the liver is balanced, and furthermore, it can be turned
on and off like a tap!
Now let's look at the other part of the team the gallbladder, this is where
things can get really dangerous! The liver simmers, it resents and shouts and it
rails, but the gall bladder untamed is the generator of pure wrath and fury. It
is the place from which the energy to wreak havoc and destruction comes; and at
that point the judgment making skill of the gall bladder go offline in order to
fully facilitate all hell being let loose most efficiently.
The gall bladder, when balanced, facilitates: good decision making abilities,
creative impetus and inspiration.
When imbalanced or, blown it, will manifest to varying degrees: irritability,
rage, pure reckless wrath and fury, bitterness, constant sadness and
impertinence.
Anger Management - EFT with the 'Hellraiser'
I will never forget the day I walked into a centre where I was practising EFT
to find the receptionist looking downright scared. I walked in to my room and
she followed whispering "Your first client is waiting, oh God Ananga, are you
sure you want to do this? He looks dangerous."
I set my mobile phone to dial the number of reception at the touch of one
button, just in case help was required, and went out to meet the client.
As I greeted him and shook his hand, I found myself looking into the face of the
scariest looking person I have ever encountered. Everything about that mans face
said "be very, very afraid of me". Yet I felt a different message from his hand
shake and lead him into my room with a strange blend of apprehension and
curiosity.
He sat down heavily and said "I need you to help me before I kill someone." OK I
said, and then sat and listened as he told me of his past and how his anger had
built and built over the years. How at borstal he survived spells of bedwetting
by being too terrifying to tease or bully about it. How last week he had thrown
a man down a flight of steps for being sarcastic to him. And having done that,
realised he was in danger of ending up in prison again. Plus, and the pain in
his face was obvious when saying this, his family where all scared of him and
avoided him.
What did we do? I tapped the side of my eye and had him do the same as he
continued to speak (there was a moment where I was afraid that he would erupt at
the ludicrousness of my suggesting such a thing for such an intense and major
problem, but by then I knew that we had built a nice rapport and that once we
got going things should start to diffuse quite nicely like a pressure valve).
After a few minutes, and him being aware of some release, we could use EFT more
specifically to start getting the rest of his energy system back on line and to
bring in the resources I have spoken of here. We tapped for angry memories and
situations; we tapped for "anger being the only thing that gets me through" etc
etc. Oh how I love EFT in these situations! That such a technique exists that
can reset the energy fuses and sooth the beliefs that cause them to repeatedly
trip out at the same time is something we can all be very very glad for.
At the end of our time together that man had a sensitivity and softness about
him that makes my eyes well up every time I remember him. He was a very
intelligent, very sensitive human being who had found himself in a series of
abusive and threatening situations throughout his life, one after the other,
until he found himself living in hell and, one day, decided to become a master
of hell rather than its slave. As he got up to leave he stepped forward and
hugged me, I hugged him back and found myself feeling great warmth for him, and
admiration too.
As he left the centre the ladies behind reception stood and watched with their
mouths hanging open, the change was that apparent. And next week when he
returned he told me that he had spent some time with his family again and that
they had all declared that something in him had changed and they now wanted to
keep in touch.
Anger Management - Furious Old Ladies
Here's another that I cannot resist mentioning. I will keep it brief here,
but will mention that I really learned some amazing energy system impacting the
physicality associations from this.
A very small, sweet, elderly lady once came to see me about a pain in her
shoulder. As she was talking she became agitated and said that there were things
held in her about which she felt very bitter. We chose her a set-up statement
and began to tap the sequence of EFT points. As we reached the gall bladder
point at the side of her eye I notice a slight shift in her and so we continued
tapping on that point for a few seconds longer. What happened next I truly wish
could have been captured on a camera. It is one of the most amazing things I've
seen! That ladies face, that had previously looked so gentle, turned into a mask
of pure rage. It was actually scary to see, it was like a horror movie where
you see a face begin to turn into a monster - there was a twisted and distorted
expression of hatred and fury that was very real and very frightening.
Gradually, as we continued tapping her face relaxed until, after a few moments,
she sighed and said, "thank you dear that does feel much better". Bloody hell!
After she left I had to go and stand outside for a few minutes to compute that
one. And there have been others too, I remember one lady who was furious with
her husband for dying and leaving her, her left shoulder was frozen and barely
moveable, and when she left it was moving much more freely.
Silvia mentioned that she got relief by tapping her middle finger point, this is
the heart protector as previously mentioned, it is the meridian that governs the
extreme of our emotional response and when pacified it facilitate an awareness
of, and concern for, the wellbeing and feelings of those around us. She went on
to say,
"There is no shame in having a blown out, unstable major body meridian as a
result of accident or incident."
"I didn't do this to myself, and I wasn't 'born bad'."
Here, here, it's just one of the many things that can and do happen when a
circuit gets blown, we wouldn't leave a fuse tripped out in our homes and
neither should we suffer such havoc in our real home the physical and energy
body that strives to serve and facilitate us always.
Ananga Sivyer
http://Ananga.net
References:
Added May 22, 2004
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