Case Story: Creating an Entity

I chose to write about my own story for this. My father was murdered the 8th of October 2009, 4 days after my birthday. I loved my dad and still do so very much in fact I love him more, we had quite the choppy relationship but he was the best dad he could possibly be and with the knowledge he had. My father wasn't around that much, work took up most of his time. The loving moments that we did have are few but so vivid in my memory, as well as the physical gifts he had given me. I didn't get many things from him to remember him by, he just never knew what to get us as gifts and opted to mainly give us money instead so we could choose what we wanted. The few things I have of him I treasure dearly, to the point where I refused to let them go I don't care how beaten up they are or unusable, I just could never part with them. These artefacts meant so much to me, they are all I used to think I had left of him. Through these things I had made an Energetic Relationship, I had created an Entity.

There is one thing in particular, which was a Nokia phone. He paid for the upgrade and we had fun together figuring out this state of the art phone he helped me to get. This phone meant I could take photos of our times together; something my family isn't so good with. We just never do photos.

My fiance and myself went to the UK for two years, and in the time we were there my father was killed, it was dreadful I spiralled out of control and was in such a pit of depression, I gained so much weight and was so bitter, angry and depressed, I clung onto anything I could find but that phone I especially treasured. I treasured it because it was a symbol of one of the nicest weeks we had together, it was a symbol of us communicating and phoning each other and making plans for his visit to us in the UK. It meant the world to me. When I started this exercise I was having such a hard time doing this, it is raw it is painful but I knew it had to be done. The wound doesn't want to heal so this is a start, a salve to help it on a little. I started by de-stressing myself as this was causing me severe discomfort, digging so deep into this pain, when I was stable I started tapping on 'The Nokia Phone my dad gave me, it evolved to I'm scared of getting rid of the phone he gave me, because I'm scared of losing the few precious and priceless memories that I still have of him. This stirred a lot of emotion, and I had to stabilize myself again with the de-stressing protocol. It felt like I was experiencing the news of his death all over again. My right hand side of my body went into a massive spasm, it was so very painful, at that point I could hardly breathe the emotion had taken such a hold of me, I went through the 'stress' protocol again and again till I was stable. As I continued through this work, so many realizations came up. "The phone was a symbol of our relationship, it was broken but we worked hard at communication and we still loved each other dearly." "The phone is a symbol of our relationship, our relationship wasn't perfect, and in many ways broken but at one time in our life it was fully functional and the times it worked it was beautiful, it made me so happy." I carried on by tapping on things like "I love you dad" which really helped me to evolve this pain, as well as Please forgive me for anything I did, and "I forgive you for leaving me", I went through a whole process and eventually came away still feeling tender and raw but so much more at peace with his death, with our relationship and knowing that He is still with me. It was an intense week for me working through this, but it was worth it and it helped me to love my dad even more and appreciate his love for me so much deeper. I realized that I don't need those things to remember him by, he is with me always no object will replace our relationship nor bring him back. By giving up this broken phone, I didn't throw him away in fact he became clearer in my Energy System and it enables me to have a healthy relationship with him.

** Further Info **

+ Contact Maryke Blom via GoE Member's Page 
+ Distance Learning
+ Contact The AMT