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Opening To My Magic by Rory O'Connor
Rory O'Connor writes: Hi all, I want to share a story with you all. This is part one a transformational story that spans three days of the 2003 European Energy Psychology Conference held in Brighton. This story has its roots in the past (so to speak), and the effects of these three days will continue to be felt, by myself and many, many others, long into the future. Everyone who saw me at Andrew Hahn's session on the Saturday, or attended the workshop on Monday will know what I mean. Anyone who saw me standing in the exhibition hall on the Sunday bawling my eyes out, will also have some idea of what I mean!!
If in reading this story, you feel that I have missed an important point, please let me know and I will add it.
I also suspect that in the act of reading this story, some people may have some new ideas or insights. The reason for this will become clearer as the story proceeds. If you do have any strange thoughts however, please let us know, as it is part of the bigger story.
Okay, hold onto your hats...
OPENING TO MY MAGIC: DAY 1
Saturday 9th August 2003
I was at breakfast on Saturday morning, trying to decide what breakout session to attend that day. It was a toss-up between Disassociation 101 and so other session that I now forget. While waiting for Paul and Tom (the Irish guys) to join me, I saw one of the delegates sitting on their own. I’m a shy kind of person, but I had seen this person at The Light Language workshop the night before, sitting with Meryl Becks. I thought that he was a friend of Meryl’s, so I invited him to join me at the table. Tony [Dickinson] (as he introduced himself) was more than happy to do so.
I asked Tony what he did, and he said that he had just come to Energy Psychology since attending the GoE conference in Oxford the year before. He said that he had spent the last year studying and training in an incredible technique developed by Andre Hahn called Guided Self-Healing. He explained that it used a 5-step protocol that integrated different interventions (including EP) and also made use of stories and Archetypes. This really interested me! I am really interested in storytelling, as I have realised that most of my life has revolved around storytelling in some form or other (puppetry, animation, comics, game-design, etc). I made up my mind there and then to attend the breakout session that morning on Guided Self-Healing.
I said to Tony that this must be synchronicity, him sitting there telling us about the breakout session. I think so, he said. Little did we both know what was going to happen over the course of the next three days, and how our lives were intertwined.
The Breakout Session
Following Andy Hahn’s introduction to his protocol, I was more and more convinced that I would be working with his methodology in the future. When the time came for a demonstration, Andy asked everyone interested in being a client, to put their name into a draw. I was eager to be selected. There had been a feeling building over the course of the past three months. It was a sense that we are finally beginning to understand how the concept of magic relates to The Field and quantum physics. I had also had some past life readings done by two different people, who placed me as a magician at the time of Merlin. They also had said that I was either unable to speak out, or that I was prevented from speaking what I knew. I really wanted to unlock the meaning of this.
After the names went in, I turned to Tom and said If I don’t get picked, I still want to work with you on this thing anyway. Just as those words came out, I heard Andy calling my name. I was the client!
Before I go into what happened during the session, I just want to say that Guided Self-Healing is one of the most powerful and profound ways of helping people that I have ever seen. It is the most elegant way of moving someone towards spiritual opening as quickly and as gently as possible. I say ‘as possible’ because it can sometimes be quite emotional and some people describe it as being pulled through a wringer! The protocol is also incredibly rigorous leaving no stone unturned. As a client you are guided, yet in total control. And the muscle-testing really helps to keep everything on track.
After the introductions, Andy asked me what I wanted to work on. I said, I want to open to my magic. It was as simple and as profound as that. I’m not sure of the whole protocol, so forgive me if I leave anything out. The important thing is what happened with the aid of the protocol.
After checking using kinesiology, Andy identified that this was indeed what needed to be worked on. He asked me to repeat the statement; along with it’s opposite. He then asked me to identify where in my body I felt anything. I initially felt a sensation in my chest (I can’t quite remember what happened here. If anyone who was in the audience could remind me, I would appreciate it). But then I felt a tingling in my left index finger. This has been happening (now that I think about it) for the past three months. I had put it down to starting to feel the energy fields around me. Andy said that this tingling had a story to tell. He asked, What are you here to teach us. He also asked me to go into the feeling, and see/feel/hear what it was saying.
As soon as I put my intention on the tingling in my finger, an image started to open up in my mind’s eye. It was like a camera swooping down into the tingling and onto a movie set. Suddenly, I could see that I was in Arabia. I was wearing a fez, and three guards with scimitars were chasing me. I realised that I had stolen something. I was running down a street past market stalls to my right. I came to a junction. My was instinct was telling me to go left, but I turned and ran to the right. I then ran down some steps enclosed by walls on both sides. A rope or clothesline hung between these two walls. I grabbed the rope, swung up onto it, balancing precariously, and dived in through an opening on my right.
I was now in darkness, in a room with no light. I turned and looked towards the window. I could see the heads of the guards as they ran past. After a few moments, I stuck my head outside the window, to check that it was all clear. Looking to the right I could see the guards off in the distance. When I turned left however, I saw a fourth guard standing there watching me! I looked on helpless as he raised his scimitar and brought in down on my neck, slicing though my jugular, but leaving my head still attached to my body. My body slumped onto the ledge with arms and neck hanging out the window. This is it, I thought, as I watched the blood run down the wall onto the steps below.
The next thing I noticed was that I was standing outside my body, looking at it lying on the ledge. I think I’m dead, and that I’m now a soul I said to Andy. He muscle-tested, and I tested weak. You’re not dead yet he said. Okay here’s the deal he started, (I love those words!), You were killed, but you disassociated before you died. You never fully died. Now you are living the Death-Wish Story, where a part of you wants to die even now, as a way of completing that story. He asked me to say the words I want to die. I tested VERY strong. Okay, I want you to go back into your body, and I want you to die fully. Stay with the body this time. When you have died, I want you to leave through the top of the head. I obliged. When that was complete, he told me to go to the light. I did so, and in doing so felt an incredible sense of oneness as my body dissolved, and became one with the light.
During this time I had the sense that I was meant to meet a magician that day, but things had not gone according to plan.
Things get a bit blurry for me here, but as I recall, I pictured myself as a vessel, with beautiful coloured light being poured into my body. It swirled around inside my, around my legs, body, arms and finally my head. When I was brimming with colour, a cork stopper was plugged into my head. Next thing I knew, I was being shaken, so that all the colours were completely mixed. This description raised a laugh form the audience.
I had a sense that the process of opening up to my magic would take three days. I was not wrong there!
Later, in the Q&A session that followed, a number of interesting points were raised. These were:
That I had been caught stealing before, as a teen!
I realised that up until this point in time, I didn’t really place a proper value on things – that I would try to pay less than what the item was worth, or get away without paying for an item or service at all.
I always used to say, I always get caught; whether it was for school pranks, unsolicited remarks, or doing things that I shouldn’t have. It was as if I had a built in mechanism that ensured that I ‘always got caught’. When I reviewed some of these scenarios, they appeared to have completely change. An example is one night when I sneaked out of my house to meet some friends. I was caught, of course! However, when I reviewed the scenario, I was seeing myself staying in bed, thinking there was no reason for me to try and sneak out. Very strange!
I’ll continue this story tomorrow, and tell you how this session with Andy unlocked some deep emotional hurt, that rose to the surface the next day.
Let there be Light! (and laughter, don't forget the laughter!)
OPENING TO MY MAGIC: DAY 2
Sunday 10th August:
Following on from the session yesterday, I was walking on air. My biggest concern was how I could justify staying on another day to take Andy’s workshop on Monday. I was reluctant to contact my (pregnant) wife and tell her that I would be staying on. I felt that I should get home. On Sunday, I attended Peter Delves session on The Trouble With Money [At this point, I just want to say what a great trainer that Peter is, and if you ever have a chance to see him in action, do take the opportunity]. This was extremely apt, considering the dilemma I found myself in, with regards to Andy’s workshop. During the session, Susan [Courtney] was working with me using EFT on the statement, money keeps leaving my hands. Susan said that she sensed a great loss. I noted that I could see her point based on the language I had used. I then went into the round, and as I did so, I started to use the statement, I let them down. This then changed to I let HIM down. I started to get an image of Gary, a childhood friend.
Gary had committed suicide at the age of 19. He had left a note saying that he could see ‘no point in going on’. The last time I had seen Gary was three months earlier on a bus. We had not been close at the time of his suicide, but I always remembered the good times we had as children. His death had a profound effect on me. I swore that I would never let myself get to a point where I felt that there was ‘no point’.
During this EFT session I had a sense that I had left him down on a soul level. Somehow, I had broken an agreement. Tears came welling up over something that I thought that I had come to terms with long ago. I completed the EFT session with Susan, feeling like I had cleared most of the issue. That was not the case, however. When we broke for lunch, I found that I simply could not hold a conversation without tears welling up. I carried such a profound sense of loss and betrayal. It really hurt. It got to the point where I couldn’t open my mouth without sobs coming out of my mouth.
I knew that I had to find Andy, and that this sudden emotion was connected with what had started yesterday in the session. I finally found Andy, and asked him for his help. He said, Sure, what is it? I opened my mouth to explain, and the sobs just poured out. There I stood in the middle of the exhibition hall trying to explain what was going on, but unable to do so. I was incomprehensible due to the tears and sobs that blocked my speaking. Eventually I was able to explain that I felt that I betrayed Gary on a soul level. Andy went straight to work with the muscle testing. I can’t remember the whole protocol, but again, will describe it as best I can remember.
Andy tested whether this indeed was what I needed to be worked on. It tested strong. I followed the sensation in my chest, and let it tell its story. I felt that I had betrayed Gary, that we were both here to do something and that I had let him down. I was not there for him when he needed me. I can’t quite remember how we got to it, but Andy said that I should call in Gary, and start talking to him. So I pictured Gary in my mind’s eye, and this is what unfolded. I had indeed betrayed Gary. But it was a necessary part of the process. I had gone on without him. In some way this was necessary. Gary hadn’t asked for help. And I hadn’t offered. He needed to learn to ask for help. To learn the effects of NOT asking for help. He also needed to see my strength. By experiencing that ‘not asking for help’ Gary had somehow learned something. And I had agreed to help with that lesson, by ‘letting him down’. So in fact, I had not betrayed him. It was all part of the story.
All that may sound like an easy way of shifting guilt, but the effect was quite deep. A deep sense of calm came over me. My emotions were still quite volatile (not surprising considering how I had been feeling just ten minutes before), but calmed over the next few hours.
After all that I realised this is part of the three-day process!! I’m going to be clearing gunk from my system over the next few days! Oh god! I decided that if this was going to happen, I needed to be around Andy or Tony, or someone who could facilitate the Guided Self-Healing. This made the decision of attending the workshop the next day a little easier. I knew that I should be there, but my concerns about my wife where quite prominent. How could I call her and tell her that I had to stay on an extra day especially when she was basically covering the costs of my being here! During that same lunch break people were asking if I were attending the workshop. They said that I was needed to make up the numbers. I was not going to be caught in a guilt trip, but still, I really wanted to be there. It was my fear that was preventing me from doing so.
In the afternoon, I attended David Grudemeyer’s incredible session on Healing ‘Separation from God’ Stories. One of the things that stuck in my mind was that ‘you experience guilt when you grow’. He said this in the context of stepping outside the norms. Boy was I feeling guilt when I thought about staying for Andy’s workshop. If this was growth – OUCH!
During the afternoon tea break, I sat with Peter, Jaqui and Chrissie – three great people to have in the workshop. I knew that I should go to the workshop. Peter told me that he had changed his plans and was going to the workshop. He had based his decision on all the things that we had been telling him abut it.
In trying to decide what to do, I bumped into Pam. Pam had been at the session on Saturday, and had witnessed my story about Arabia. Pam said that she was attending the workshop, and that she had re-arranged her flights to do so. Pam acted as a sort of inspiration for me. Pam also had a much bigger part to play, but more on that later!
Finally, I plucked up the courage to phone the airline, and change my flights. They were able to do so for a nominal cost. As usual, it had been a bigger worry in my head, than in reality. Talking to my wife was a little harder.
And so, by Sunday evening I knew that I would be attending Andy’s workshop on Monday, guilt and all!
Stayed tuned for Day 3.
OPENING TO MY MAGIC: DAY 3
Monday 11th August: A Group Healing
On Monday, there were 12 people for the workshop alongside Andy, Tony, Joanie and later Kathy, the facilitators. When asked why they had attended the workshop, all attendees said that they ‘knew they just had to be here’. We all knew that we were gathered for a reason. This revealed itself as the day progressed. Each person in the group has their own story to tell about what happened to them that day. For the purposes of this story, I will only mention elements that are relevant to me, so as to maintain privacy for the other attendees. What would be great though, would be if the rest of you who attended on Monday were willing to share your tales!
Anyhow, the workshop started with Andy covering the principles of Guided Self-Healing. He then went on to facilitate a group healing session. To do this he needed to find the focus -the person whose issue would resonate with the others in the group. Andy went around the group muscle-testing to identify the person that he should work with.
The person was identified, and they confessed to knowing it would be them from the point where they walked into the room. They said that their discomfort was rising as they were waiting to be picked. As Andy worked with this person, they identified that the needed to work on 'I can’t speak’. Andy suggested that we all work on ourselves as he worked with this person.
As soon as the person said, "I can’t speak", I felt a lump in my throat. I knew that this is what I would be working on. I went into the feeling, and suddenly I had an image of myself as a druid in England standing atop a hill in the centre of a stone circle. As I looked in front of me, I could see three Roman soldiers walking up the hill towards me. I had a sense that there were asking me who I was. I was denying that I was a druid. I was denying who I was. I then watched as they pierced me with their spear. I died with the knowing that I should have just spoken the truth, I should have stayed true to who I am, as they were going to kill me anyway.
Andy then went to complete the healing protocol. He asked that we surround this feeling in our body with light, golden light, and that me move it outside of our body to the centre of the room. You could feel the vibration of the room go up quite a bit when we all did this. There was a sense that there was this big ball of energy in the middle of the room. We continued to focus on the ball of golden light, as it healed/changed what was there. After this he asked us to look at the vacuum that was created by removing this blockage from our system. When I imagined looking into this hollow in my throat, I could see the druid, all curled up in the foetal position, as if he had been sleeping there all this time! I then saw him climb out of this hollow space and he stood exactly as I stood, as if he was merging with my body. He then said that Now I can teach you all you need to know.
It was an incredible feeling, and all the time I was reminded of something that had happened last May at an incredible Intuition workshop held by Dr. Elaine Woodall in Ireland. On two separate occasions over the weekend, while I had an intuitive reading done for me, two people mentioned that I had a connection with Merlin, and the era of King Arthur. Now, for those who know me, I would not appear to be a person interested in Merlin and Arthur. I consider myself a Celt through and through. I am more interested in Celtic Mythology than Arthurian legend. But what was interesting about what these two people had said was that one of them said, You know as much as Merlin, but are unable to, or are prevented from speaking. The other person said, You are a great healer. You are not just interested in the magic, but how and why it works. You are trying to tell people, but nobody will listen. You are frustrated because you can’t speak.
If I was to trace a timeline between these events, the Arabia one happened first, followed by the event as a druid atop the hill, finally catching up with these stories about Merlin. For a long time I have wondered about the question of past lives. My feeling is that they are real. I do also, however, think of them as stories that allow us to integrate experiences, or feelings that our body/consciousness is trying to bring to our attention. I am interested in what these stories tell me allegorically, and the meaning that I can take from them. Take it, as you will. One thing I can tell you about this healing circle…I got off lightly. Some incredible stories were told, and there was a huge amount of emotional release, as baggage was dumped, and realisations experienced. It truly was incredible. And again, it was the speed and (relative) gentleness of the protocol that astounded me.
As I sat there, and Andy worked with the group, I keep looking at a glass that sat across the room. I had this incredibly strong feeling that if I picked up the glass, I would be able to simply mould it in my hands, as if it were putty. I did try, and it didn’t work, but the feeling still remains with me to this day.
After Andy had gone around the whole group checking that everything was cleared we broke for lunch, to gather again at 2pm. I was very excited about the afternoon session. Guide Self-Healing is very powerful, and I knew that I could expect some more wonderful experiences as I continued to 'Open to My Magic'.
After lunch, Andy took us through the 5-step protocol. We then teamed up into triads (a observer, facilitator and client), so that we could experience taking someone through, and being guided through the protocol. Again Andy muscle-tested to see who would be with whom. I was teamed with Tony (of course) and Pam. Pam was the lady who had inspired me by her willingness to change her flight, to be able to attend Andy’s workshop. Did you ever see someone who catches your eye, but you can’t understand why? Well, Pam was one of those people. And soon, you’ll see why!
We three decided to go to a secluded area in the Hotel lobby. We were confident that we would not need peace and quiet for this work. Hah!
Pam agreed to go first as the client, with myself as the facilitator. Tony was there to help and facilitate the process. I am going to describe some of Pam’s story, simply because it has direct relevance to what happened next.
Pam said that she wanted to work on being in bystander mode. This issue came up because she didn’t have anything to report from the group session earlier. Tony suggested that we ask…if you could get anything out of this session, even if it was a miracle, what would it be? Pam said that she would like to experience that connection with Source that others feel. And how would that make her feel? I’d feel elation, she replied.
As I worked with her, we identified a sensation in her throat. Tony asked whether we needed to amplify the feeling before working on it. Pam muscle-tested strong. Tony asked her to intensify the feeling. Pam did this, and almost immediately started to gag. She said that she felt like she was going to get sick. Pam became more distressed. I tried to keep calm and keep working. We checked whether an intervention was needed now, to help Pam. Yes. Does Pam know what it is? No. Does Rory? Yes. I went through my toolkit. We eventually tested strong on channelling. I would normally have said energy healing, but those were the words that came out. So, I tried to focus, while Pam sat gagging beside me, and I pictured energy flowing into her body, easing her discomfort. This appeared to ease things a little. Tony then suggested that he take over. I was more than happy that he do so.
When Pam followed the feeling in her throat, she found herself standing in an old stone kitchen, looking out to a garden. There was a pungent smell coming from a boiling pot. She said that it was making her nauseous. She also noticed a table with some herbs on it. She felt that the herbs were calling to her. We check whether this was all we needed to know before carrying out the intervention. No. We explored it further, and Pam described a feeling in her arm. She said that she would get this feeling regularly.
After some questions and muscle-testing we discovered that we needed to deal with an issue in Pam’s arm. It was an ‘entity’ story. She said that she felt like her arm was not a part of her. We followed this line, as Pam brought her attention to her arm. Suddenly, Pam was in great pain. Her body twisted, and she moaned that her arm was being mangled. She said that she was being tortured.
We stopped there and Tom said, Here’s the deal. We are dealing with a death-wish story. You were meant to die here, but you didn’t complete the dying process. You need to go back in and complete the story.
Pam did this. I was very uncomfortable watching the anguish on her face as she allowed herself to die. Afterwards, Tony asked her to look for the light. Pam couldn’t see anything. She could only sense a blackness behind her. Eventually Pam was able to draw find the light. The light did not envelop her, however, it enveloped the Wheel that was used to torture her. This wheel became bathed in golden light. It then moved, so that it floated down to the floor. It started to spin, and as it did so, it began to emit white light. It had transformed into a portal. Pam was able to step into the light emitted by the wheel, and so complete her story. When asked how it felt, to be part of that light, she said that she felt elated!
We checked to see how many lessons there were to learn from all this. We muscle-tested to see who would provide the learning’s. It turned out to be me for most of them. And here they are:
1. You cannot experience light without darkness. They are all one. The darkness that Pam experienced was there so that she could fully experience the light. This was evidenced in the transformation of the implement of her death from something bad, to something truly magnificent.
2. Pam had witnessed something, and had not spoken out (remember the healing session earlier that day?), and now she was being tortured.
3. The herbs that Pam saw on the table were poisonous. It was a poison that was being brewed. Pam could have ended her life this way, and it would have been less painful.
I can’t remember what the fourth lesson was, but it came from Pam.
After this we broke for tea, and we were all a little worn and exhilarated from the experience. This process had taken about an hour to complete. It is amazing how much ground you are able to cover when you use the Guided Self-Healing protocol.
When we started again, I said that I would like to do something about the fact that there are times when I am working, and I know that I should be focusing or doing one thing, and yet, I watch as I turn around and do something else that just doesn’t serve me. This has been a recurring problem in my life. Again Tony suggested we ask, if I could have anything… I then rephrased the statement, as I want to be able to do what I want to do, when I want to do it. This was a more elegant statement, and covered far more than just work issues. Pam muscle-tested was this the correct statement and it tested strong. So we got down to work.
As soon as we started, I said that I had a memory. This was not a feeling, but a memory. We tested strong that I should follow it. I described a scene, where I was a baby, in the kitchen of our old house. I was still in nappies. I was dancing on the floor having a great time, trying to get my mother’s attention. She had her back to me as she stood at the kitchen sink, peeling potatoes for the dinner. I waddled over to her, and grabbed her trouser leg for support. I could really feel the polyester fabric in my hand. I tugged at her trousers, but she swatted me away. I fell to the ground behind her. I could sense that the others thought this was a big thing. It wasn’t, I just got up, dusted myself and went back over to her. I tugged on her trouser leg again. This time she turned and yelled at me. I can’t remember the exact words, something like would you ever go away! [I am reluctant to include this in case people think, oh what an awful mother. I don’t know if this really happened or not. All I know is that it has significance in terms of what it led to next].
After this happened, I began to describe a feeling like an intense energy around my head. As if there was thick gel covering the crown and back of my head. As I explored this sensation, the feeling changed to it being some fabric over my head. Then…It’s black, and there’s a noose around my neck. Suddenly the whole scene shifted. I sensed that I was either in the Wild West or Revolutionary France. I tested strong for France.
I started to describe that I was standing on top of a gallows’, and I had this black bag over my head and a noose around my neck. I was being accused of something that I had not done. I wasn’t too bothered. Then I got the feeling that Paul [my brother, and energy worker] was stood beside me on the gallows. He too was hooded and about to be hung. He turned to me as said Here we go again!
Suddenly, the doors beneath us opened, and we dropped. I had the sensation that I slipped through the noose. I felt onto a pile of dead bodies beneath me, all hidden inside the enclosed platform. I lay on the ground and watched as Paul’s body, twitched and writhed, before he died. I could hear the guards running down the steps to come looking for me. There was nowhere to hide. I scrambled underneath some of the bodies, hoping that they’d think I too had died. The guards entered, and systematically poked their bayonets though all the bodies. One of the strokes passed through my heart. I opened my mouth to scream, and some body part fell into my mouth. I started to gag and choke, and that is how I died. Not from the wound in my heart.
The next thing I know, I am standing beside Paul in this white space. I realise that I am a soul. Paul turned to me and said, That went well, didn’t it? [I still smile when I remember that line]. It was then that things started to really happen. I suddenly had the realisation that Paul and I were time-travellers (of a soul-kind). It was as if we were a crack team, and it is our job to travel to different points in time to reveal to people what is possible. Our sense of humour is considered a necessary component because we would be persecuted and killed for the things that we would/will do and say. I also realised that one of the people who had been at the workshop, was only on ‘the team’. As I recounted all this to Tony and Pam, a torrent of tears was flowing down my face. I have never felt such joy in my life. It was like waking up from a coma, or ‘coming home’. I had had a peak behind the curtain to see what was really happening backstage!
I realised that I have to be ME. Just ME. And in doing so, I would show people what is possible. I also have to speak out, and speak the truth, and not deny who I am, or what I know. For those who really know me, you might find this kind of odd, considering I have been quite a shy person. This is changing. Hence this great big article!!
I also sensed that the fact that Paul and I are brothers in this life is doubly significant. There is something in this unity that we must reflect. I had the sense that I should stop worrying, because there is nothing to worry about. Seeing the bigger picture, I know that things will work out one way or the other. Things will always work out; it is just a matter of how easily we allow it to happen.
Another thing that came up was that our baby (due in Dec) will also have a big part to play in all this, just as my wife does now.
It was at this stage that I took over the session. I was now guiding the others through it. I was answering questions either before they were asked or as they were being asked. It was as if the muscle-testing had become irrelevant in this session. It was still comforting to have it as a backup.
When I finally relaxed from all my crying, and had a cup of tea (I really needed it). We asked how many lessons there were to learn. I knew it was two before we had finished posing the question. Tony had one, and Pam, the other. The way it would work, was that, each person would say something, and I would respond. The learning would come from my responses. I offered to Tony that he go first.
Tony sat for a few seconds, before leaning over in his chair, so that his face was close to mine. You have opened something inside of me, he said. For him, witnessing what happened showed him that he was travelling the correct path. I leaned towards him now and said, Welcome to the Team. That now made four.
I knew already now, what would happen with Pam. I asked her, to say something. She said that all she was getting was picture of me in a row boat on a river, and it was sailing towards a light. I knew that there was more. I asked her to say some more. Pam said that she could see me reaching out over the back of the boat, as if beckoning to someone. I was frantic. You are in that scene I said to Pam. Pam started to get a little distraught. I can’t see it she said, all I can she is you and there’s a mist around you, shrouding everything. I heard myself speak. This is Avalon, and that is a magical mist. You are very near, but cannot see me because of the mist. I knew that I could clear the mist. In my mind’s eye, I gestured with my hands, and the mist parted. Pam was standing there on the shore in front of me. I gestured again, and she floated across the water to wards me, until we were together in the boat. We then sailed into the light, as one.
Afterwards, we realised that Pam had needed to re-experience her connection with Source, for this part of the story to unfold. That is why I included it.
I then got the sense that this thing was a portal. A number of names came to mind like Northumberland and Warwickshire, but when I checked a map later, the visual image in my mind, was Lincolnshire. [Tony told me afterwards that he is from Northumberland and he lives in Warwickshire!] I started to speak again…that this was a portal and that it was opening again now. It was not a portal in the sci-fi sense. It was a portal of transformation. When people come into contact with this invisible portal, they will be transformed. This portal was on an island, with three trees. The trees represent Tony, Pam and I.
I also got the name Carrrickmine. I sensed that this was an Irish location of a portal. It was only afterwards, when talking to my sister-in-law about Carrickmine that she reminded me that it is the site of a legal battle regarding an archaeological dig and the building of a motorway in Dublin. Now, if I was to consciously choose a location for a portal in Ireland I would have picked somewhere in Co. Meath like Tara or Newgrange, but there you go!
I then got the sense that these portals were opening all over the planet. In my mind’s eye, I could see this latticework of connections, as all these portals opened and connected with each other. This was all starting this day Monday 11th Aug 2003. Then the words 'The Quickening’ came to mind. This is all part of The Quickening. It’s as if there’s no time for messing around, we’ve got to grow as quickly as possible.
After all that, I said that there was still work for the group to do. I sensed that I would be staying around that night, even though my flight was booked for 7:50. When we gathered back in the room, I was looking out the window. Everything felt unreal. It was really like the Matrix, but on a soul level, and not technological. I had always thought that the Matrix was just a story of it’s time that explained what was happening on a soul-level, but using computers to make it more acceptable and current. I then spoke to Pam, and told her some things about what she needed to do next. It was strange hearing this come out of my mouth.
As I expected I missed the flight, but by going to the airport, they swapped my flight for free to the next day. Along the way, I texted Paul, and asked him to muscle test for I am a time-traveller’. He texted me back with: Time-traveller: yes, ET: yes, Last Life on Planet: no. Next life last? Yes. What the f@*k is going on? Later I was able to call him, and tell him exactly what happened.
That night, I met with Andy, Kathy, Tony, Joanie and David. It was a special and very personal meeting. I felt like I was being welcomed into the fold of people who had already discovered their purpose in life. I will always be thankful for the kindness that was shown and the compliments made that night.
Since then, things haven’t gotten any less weird. I have noticed an incredible increase in synchronicities. But that is to be expected I regularly phone people only for them to tell, me that a) they were about to phone me, or b) they were about to phone me. I have also had a number of clients come to me about little things, which have led to them opening up in some form. Even my Reiki has changed, where I have started to communicate much more with the client as I work, passing on information as it comes to me.
One interesting thing involves a writer friend of mine, who has been writing a sci-fi TV script. I told him my tale and he said that Oh my god, that fills a gap in my story that I have been trying to figure out. As we spoke, I said to him… You do know, that we know each other for a reason. He said that he did, and that it was his job to get these stories out to a wider audience. I agreed, and added, that we would work together on these things.
And that has been a big realisation. Everyone I come into contact with will be affected in some way - sometimes big, sometimes small. That means that all of you who are reading this story, are reading it for a reason. Please do share any experiences you have with the list on which you have read this story, or you can email me directly.
This is just a sample of what has been happening since I got back from Brighton.
Since talking to Paul, we both feel that March 2005 is an important time in Ireland, and how it relates to the world. We’ll keep you posted on this.
And now a request. I would appreciate it if anyone could shed some light on these portals. The River Glen in Lincolnshire seems significant as a location for the island. Are there any dowsers who would like to explore this?
Finally, I would just like to thank everyone who has helped in Opening Up To My Magic. There are too many to list, and I suspect that I may leave someone out. You all know who you are…everyone who has been a part of my life in some form or other. The one person I will thank is Paul, who has always been more than a brother to me…and now I know why!
Phew, that took me some time to write! I hope that you enjoyed my story and I would really appreciate your comments and feedback.
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