Public Speaking From The Heart
How To Enchant, Engage & Delight Your Audience Live, On Stage & On TV
With Detlev Tesch
If you will, just imagine for a moment …
You are standing in a large conference room.
There are 130 people looking at you, waiting for you to start speaking.
How did that make you feel?
Chances are you didn‘t feel comfortable or even that you had a very unpleasant experience just from imagining that.
I have read that polls in the US showed that folks are more afraid of speaking in front of a group of people than they are of dying. I think it was a comedian who moulded this into a joke: At a funeral the guy holding the eulogy is worse off than the guy in the coffin.
These polls tell us that there are very, very many people with this problem who need help.
Now - Is this fear of public speaking a natural, innate property? No definitely not – even if many people may feel like that or believe that they could never speak publicly. Just look at children at a young age. Most of them have to be stopped from stealing the show. Cat Stevens put it like this in one of his songs, „From the moment I could talk I was ordered to listen now…“
So, since it is not innate this fear, anxiety, uneasiness is a learned response nested into our energy system. And that is good news. That means we can effectively do something about it and the instrument of our choice is EMO.
And YOU personally you can profit immensely in at least two ways:
1.Help clients overcome their problem make them happy and earn a lot by charging them for it.
2.Overcome this inhibition for yourself and grow your business as an EMO Practitioner by public speaking establishing yourself as an expert.
With this pattern you have a great advantage over „ordinary“ coaches and trainers who try to help people with this problem.
If you research their techniques and tips for dealing with stage fright, pre-performance jitters, anxiety, fear of speaking, you will usually find things like good preparation, rehearsing, breathing, abdominal breathing. And that is just about it.
And for me it was just the same thing in my coaching and training business. For years I had nothing better to offer than that. It left me uneasy and discontented but there was nothing I could do. That is… until I learned about energy methods.
Ok. Let‘s get this straight: These tips are good ones! When we are under stress there IS a problem with breathing. Being unprepared will throw most people into stress mode. For many people rehearsing is a way to reduce stress.
BUT we can do so much more! Thanks to EMO.
This is about going out of stress mode and then far beyond. So we can make a true connection with our audience. So we can reach their hearts from our heart. So we create a heartfelt relationship.
Energising, healing, enchanting.
So this is not going to be about preparing your speech, about knowing your subject, about the order and sequence of what you intend to say. That you can probably work out by yourself.
This is all about your energy and how to engage & delight your audience on this level.
You can use this for yourself by yourself.
You can do this with a friend, helping one another.
You can use this with clients to help them.
If you work with someone else use the pattern to guide them though the process.
The Public Speaking Pattern Step By Step
Step one – Prepare the session
Invoke the Rain Of Mercy (Innocent Energy). This nicely prepares the energy system and will usually ease a lot of tension and apprehensions.
Step two – Deal with the upcoming event
If there is a specific speaking event impending (or a horrible one that just happened) use the standard ET protocol to soften and flow the emotions related to that. (Just as a reminder - Where do you feel that in your body; soften & flow; let it all flow out; test!!!! and continue until you reach even flow, maybe even an energised end state.)
This may bring up all the aspects related to the problem (quickly or over a certain length of time) and thus it is resolved. If that is the case: be happy and joyful.
I do however advise you to continue by addressing the following issues in the following steps if they apply.
Step three – Clear the whole delivery Bit By Bit
Mentally go through the different elements of the delivery one after the other and deal with anything (even slight discomfort) that comes up:
Speaking over a longer period of time
Doing demonstrations, guiding exercises, meditations etc.
Forgetting what to say
Unexpected questions from the audience while you speak
Speaking to a small group
Speaking to a large or very large group
Objections and criticism from the audience (also ET the individuals!!)
Distracted audience (because of great events – championships, shows etc., dramatic news like 9/11; noise outside the hall…)
Interruptions (a cell phone ringing, people getting in late, hotel staff entering…)
Questions and answers segment
Taking applause and praise
Step four – Look How I failed
Look into the past. Remember a bad experience (or several) you had speaking to people and soften & flow each of them. In case there were many:
Start the process with the first (oldest) one, resolve it and while still in that energy take the next one resolve it more quickly, then the next and more and more quickly let them rush through. (Cascade pattern)
Step five – Look How they failed
Another look into the past. This time find several bad examples you had to life through –
Speakers/teachers/trainers… boring people‘s pants off
Speakers making a fool of themselves
Speakers being very pompous or arrogant.
In case there were many: Use the cascade pattern.
Step six – Look how good they are
Some folks get intimidated by how good or even great others are (or seem to be!!).
They may think, „I could never do that, I could never be that good. So why bother at all…“
Find memories of such occurrences and ET them.
In case there were many: Use the cascade pattern.
Step seven – I can‘t, I can
Here we deal with thought fields.
If you think „I can‘t do this“ where is that thought located? Show me with your hands.
Now think „I can do this“, where is that thought located, show me with your hands.
Now with your hand draw a rainbow connection from the „I can“ thought field to the „I can‘t“ thought field. What has changed for you?
With your hand draw a connection from the „I can‘t“ field to the „I can“ field.
What has changed for you?
Step eight – Healing to speak from the heart
A Special Version of the Heart Healing Meditation
I place my own healing hands
On my own true heart
To heal all wounds from
Speaking and communicating and connecting
So that I speak not only from my mouth
Not only from my mind and thoughts
So that my heart can reach out and touch
The hearts of those I talk to how near or far they may be
So my heart may connect with their hearts of energy
So my heart may instil resonance in their hearts
So my heart may help their hearts to grow stronger
So my heart may help their hearts to heal
To be able to take and give more love and joy and happiness
More and more and more
May all our hearts heal and rejoice
May we all shine like the wonderful stars
That we are meant to be.
Step nine – Go For Excellence, Rehearse
For most people there is great value in speaking out loud several times like they were in fact addressing an audience. Please do NOT read your text. That will get boring. Speak using short notes with keywords.
After you have done that several times you should be quite familiar with what you plan to say. Now is the time to take it to another level.
In your mind let a place arise for you to rehearse. That may be the place where the event is going to be or whatever your energy mind gives you now as the ideal place for you to do this.
There you go through every segment one at a time and several times. For example you practice your opening segment until it goes smoothly, then the following segments one by one several times each.
I strongly advise you to rehearse segments only – and quite a number of times. By speaking such segments often you create „building blocks“ that you will be able to use over and over again. The more often you have spoken them (live or in PS) the more confidently, assertively and competently you can say them. It is just like with the numbers 1 to 10. It took us all quite some time (and a LOT of rehearsing) to learn that sequence and, as a result, now we can count without a doubt. But, please, now put the numbers in alphabetical order….
See what I mean. You haven‘t done that ever before or thought about it a lot (well, most haven‘t). And your speaking would in this case be far less competent.
Rehearse also what you will do when people ask questions or disagree etc. Try different scenarios and different ways to reply. Ask others for examples, for questions that might come up, for objections that may be expected, and for good ideas for replies.
Here‘s a very important part: After several rounds of that: before you begin speaking you ET the group - yes, the entire group (you can do that at the live event too). And then, while you speak, let your heart of energy reach out and connect with their hearts. Practice this part several times.
This step helps you make it all a „routine“ in the sense of „I have done that so often that I can do it easily.“
Step Ten – Triumph
Once you have some routine from step nine you can add music like „Beach Party“ and „Triumph“ to your rehearsing.
Get yourself (or your client or both) an Energised End State. :)
This may condition your system to go into a state of high energy.
To prepare for live situation, it is a good idea to listen to your chosen music to loosen you up, get your energy flowing correctly, to drop shields to the audience and most importantly to connect to that energy of joy and triumph.
Connect to your audience from your heart.
Touch and delight them.
Accept your applause, enjoy it, drink it in.
It will make you better, stronger, and happier each time you step up in front of your audience and “speak from the heart”.
First publiehed in the EMO Conference Manual, 2008.